Naptime makes me laugh

Sometimes I wonder if it was the right thing to have the girls share a room. I never wonder long, because it's not like we really have a choice. There's just not room for a bed in the bathroom, and there's a table in the middle of the dining room, so....

Anyway, sometimes it seems a little cramped with both of them in the room together, and their closet is especially difficult to deal with. And then comes naptime, and it's one of those days when Addie dozed during the preschool quiet hours (and so did Mom!), so she's not very tired. And if she's not tired, Zoe's not tired. And if no one's tired, no one's sleeping and everyone's trying like crazy to have as much fun as possible without leaving their beds.

But just when the chatter from the other room was about to get me off my duff and in the mood for making short speeches and handing out reprimands, I heard the sweetest sound. Giggling. Then laughing. Then all out belly laughs. So I changed gears and tiptoed into the hallway to see what's up. I guess I'd make a bad spy, because I was caught by a toddler and a preschooler. But when I asked what they were doing, Zoe said, "We were just playing a game, Mommy. But we didn't get out of our beds, though."

"So what kind of game is it?"

"A funny one."

"But how do you play?"

"Well, um, I just go 'BLOOP!' [Addie laughs timidly in case she's about to get in trouble] on my bed like that and Addie laughs, and then I go 'BLOOP' [Addie laughs harder, since Mommy's smiling] on my bed again and she laughs some more, and then I go 'BLOOOP'...[Addie can't breath through her laughter] some more."

Just in case you didn't know, "BLOOP" means 'to begin in a kneeling position and suddenly slam your stiff upper body against a mattress and whatever other bed clutter might be immediately in front of you.'

"Oh, I see. That looks very funny. But I'd like you both to stay on your pillows now so you can get some rest, okay?"

"Okay. I'll just go 'BLOOP' on my pillow like that [Addie's bouncing, squealing, and laughing now]. Is that okay?"

How can I say no? I've certainly never managed to make Addie that happy. Can I deny her that joy and Zoe the pleasure of making her sister so happy? Really?

"I suppose it's okay, but just four more times."

"Okay. Is this four?" she asks, holding up three fingers.

"Close enough. Goodnight."

After about 15 more minutes of giggles and chatter, I heard a strange sound. Absolute silence. This time when I snuck, I wasn't caught. So I caught them on camera:

In case you can't see them, Zoe's the red and gray blob, and Addie's the socks, diaper and brown. And, being the opportunist he is,

Beau had a nice nap, too.

You know you need to vacuum when...

Our house has been happily busy these days. Even happilier busier than before Sammy's arrival. I guess you could say some of my routine chores have slipped through the cracks. Just before Christmas, Zoe (3 1/2) looked at me very sincerely and said, “Momma, I want you go vacuum.”

“Why, sweetie?” I replied, thinking instantly of hundreds of other things I could do with that particular 10 minute segment of daytime, like e-mail, watch TV, read junk mail, stare at the blank wall....

“Because you just need to. I need you to vacuum.”

You know what I'd like to say to that?

Football for Dummies

I don't really like football all that much. But I was in the band in high school, so I watched every game for 4 years. And so in college, I decided not to do band. Too much football and too much time. But then God, being the funny God that he is, sent a really cute football player into my world in September of my sophomore year. So I went to every game for the next 5 years. And what do you suppose he chose as his profession? Yup. He's a coach. So I've learned to watch games.
I could be wrong, but I'm figuring that there are women out there (to be p.c. I'll say 'people') who may benefit from my self-taught expertise on how to watch a game. So here's what's going through my head during the last part (I can't really remember when I started watching - I started and stopped a lot of times) of the BCS Ohio/UT game.
Score's close. UT's winning. Everyone's still excited, so the game must not be over just yet. Hmm. And the weather must be nice. Lots of people in short sleeves. I'm a little jealous.
Why do the Ohio State players have [illegal substance] stickers all over their helmets? Aha. Did you know that a "buckeye" is the state tree of Ohio and that its leaves are comprised of five leaflets each? Now you do. If it weren't for wikipedia, I might have been persuaded to believe that the university was using the Tostitos Bowl to push a "medicinal purposes" campaign on unsuspecting viewers. Wait. Maybe it's a grasshopper. What the heck IS that on their helmets?!?
Why is that guy wearing a Mr. Potato Head mustache? Does he think he looks cool? Because he doesn't. How did he get it there? Superglue? I'll bet tomorrow he has a Mr. Potato Head-shaped red spot right below his nose. Dumb choice.
Anyone else hungry for some tortilla chips and queso? Too bad I'm already in pjs and live in a town where the local market closed an hour and a half ago.
Maybe it's a green molecule or atom or something. Wonder if the players put them on the helmet themselves. I'll bet their backpacks and sock drawers aren't so neatly organized. Maybe the trainers did it for them.
How did they pick blue to show the line of scrimmage? Why not read? Or orange? And the other line - the yellow one. And how do they do that? It covers everything on the ground and nothing above it. Not even shoelaces. Amazing.
Wow. Her glasses are HORRIBLE. Burnt orange vertical rectangle lenses and burnt orange glittery cardboard horns across the top. Dedicated fan.
That guy's going to lose his arm if he doesn't take the rubber band off. Too tight.
Man, oh, man. Who has to try to get out all those horrible grass stains? SOOOOOOO glad it's not me. I don't even try anymore. I've decided that a perk of getting all my kids' clothes on the clearance racks at Target is that I can feel free to let the stains stay until there are so many that I can just call the clothes "junky clothes," which at our house means you can wear them to do art, wash cars, or help Daddy with any of his projects. Wonder what kind of Stain Stick UT uses.
Wow - great catch, Quan! I know I couldn't do that, or what all those other fellas were doing, either. I've never understood how people get the courage to just fling their bodies at the ground like that, and then get back up and do it again, over and over, just because.
Whew. Game over. I'm exhausted. Good game. Good game.
And that, my friends, is how you watch a football game. You're welcome.